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HOW TO DEAL WITH YOUR FEAR OF FAILURE

Hello Greatness Partner, welcome to DanielAjumobi.com – the place where people in pursuit of success come to get actionable insights. Success is desired by all, and fear of failing is experience by all. So, let’s discuss tips on dealing with the fear of failure because not until it’s dealt with, success remains far from sight.

It is popularly said that there is only a thin line between success and failure. The thin line means that there are high chances of falling to either sides of the line – as fast as you can fall into failing is the same rate at which you can find yourself on the path of success overnight, the rope is thin afterall, so the fear shouldn’t be about falling to the side of failure but how to cross over to the desired side as fast as possible.

Also, the mind is a very fertile land and fear is in the mind of every human being but what differs is how you water it because whatever is planted in it will eventually get harvested so you can’t afford to be nurturing fear which when harvested have no good to offer.  At some point or another, almost all of us have experienced self-doubt, made negative comparisons between ourselves and others, or felt like we’re not talented enough, smart, or disciplined well enough to become a success.

There’s a host of successful people today who have told the world of their failures and how it triggered their success so don’t make failure the enemy. Michael Jordan was cut from the varsity basketball team his sophomore year, Steve Jobs was fired from the company he founded, and Oprah Winfrey was fired from her job as a television news anchor that’s only to name a few. 

Failure is nothing to be ashamed of. It’s an inevitable path to success most times and could also be a necessary step toward success and innovation but you just need to learn how to ignore them.

The thing is that fear can become a self-fulfilling “prophecy”. Research also shows that there is a connection between the fear of failure and procrastination. That means that the more anxiety we feel about failing the reach our goals, the less likely we are going to take action toward achieving them. So it is important that we stop being scared of failure so we can get to work and you can achieve that by;

1. FACE THE FEAR

Whatever is making you feel the fear that you will fail or that you are a failure should be faced heads on. It’s just like having someone lie about you to your face… it’s either you defend yourself or face the consequence of someones’ lies against you- because you are not a failure so anything that wants to bring the fear of failure shouldn’t be given the freedom to do it.

“Face your fear” is definitely not a new concept. Although, it’s more straightforward to face a fear of heights, blood, an animal etc…than it is to face a fear of failure. Fears generally aren’t so real in the way you think they are. They’re just stories you tell yourself, and it is your choice to stop repeating it. Choose to stop listening to that negative voice. “Don’t even bother trying to be cool about facing your fears. Just get out there and get rejected till you get accepted, and sometimes it may get dirty but that’s OK, because you’re going to feel great after going all out to realize you disobeyed fear and thereby conquered it.

Start disobeying your fear. Try to get rejected just once and if necessary, strike up a conversation with a stranger. Ask a colleague for a cup of coffee. Speak about your idea at least once in your team meetings. You’d realize overtime that there’s no more lingering fears to take actions.

2. TALK ABOUT IT

Sometimes, overcoming fear is almost a lost battle.  No matter how much you try to face it or find a way out of it, that voice of doubt and negativity won’t go away. This second strategy is less about getting rid of fear and more about accepting to live with it. Giving your fear a voice. Talk about it with somebody…talk about it till it no longer scares you to mention it, till you can comfortably talk about it and feel nothing because hearing your fear and self-doubt from an external source will allow you to evaluate it all over again and the negative thoughts, while still there, will no longer be as overwhelming as it had been. 

I mean, it’s the same little voice all of the time. This little voice whispering you’re garbage – because hearing your fear and self-doubt from an external source will allow you to evaluate it all over again and the negative thoughts, while still there, will no longer be as overwhelming as it had been. 

Again, at the root of this strategy remains the fact that our fears are not reality. They are the stories we tell ourselves, the thoughts that we repeat over and over again so all we need to do is to hear a different and much better story often enough to keep the other one away.  We may not be able to control our thoughts, but imagining that fear is an external force can help us decide not to believe them. 

3. IGNORE IT

The first two strategies for overcoming fear which are Facing It and Talking about It,  are ways that’ll help us change how we think about and react to our anxieties and self-doubt. But sometimes the best solution is to ignore it without paying any attention to it just like you don’t give a damn about it. This can happen when you are very focused on achieving success in the tasks ahead.  Let go all kinds of worries and go ahead doing your thing, a step at a time, focusing on just that one thing, not worrying about what people will think or your own expectations, or even thinking about the outcome at all, and just focus on doing one thing.

Also, don’t worry about how long the task will last or when you will finish.. Don’t worry about if you’d do well at it, what people will say about it, or whether you’ll succeed or not. They are not relevant to the task. Similarly, you have to set aside self-judgement and comparisons to others’ work and learn to embrace the process of creation which you are working on.

You are the first version of you and the only original and whatever task you are working on has never been done by anyone exactly the way you’d do it. So give it the try while ignoring the fear.

Focus on the goal and keep going!

As my custom is, I enjoy reading back from you. So, please kindly share in the comment session below any other tips not stated above but can be of help. Drop your opinion and share your experience as related with the topic of discussion.

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